Emo = FAIL

(Let me start by saying this is my own opinion. I happen to have a few select "emo" looking friends and this is not directed at them. And if you do not like my opinion, you do not have to read it. And if you are seriously emo and this bothers you... get over it. Or go listen to The Used and cry about it. Make sure you have a tissue to catch all of that eyeliner streaking down your cheeks.)

My generation was pretty standard.

We dressed semi-normal (not counting the sagging pants of course, but it appears those will never go away). We didn't have boys walking around in girls jeans and shirts and we didn't have girls looking like they spray painted a dead lap dog and put it on their head and called it a hair style. We had our small handful of goth kids but we didn't have an army of  "ohmygod I'm going to cut myself and drink my own tears because my parents won't let me go to the Hawthorne Heights concert" kids.

I was out the other day at a very popular sporting/shopping district called Westgate. LOTS of people hang out there, so naturally, there are a ton of these emo-tards everywhere... and I started to notice something. The boys were wearing girls earrings. Not just any earrings, but big fairy-sparkly hoop fucking earrings... on both ears. Combine that with the tight pants, the tight shirts, the eyeliner and the hair falling in their face and you have the next stars of RuPaul's Drag U. I'm not kidding... they were these HUGE hoop earrings! The final kick to my brain came when I saw this kid... he was quite chunky and he was in a pair of bright purple tight-as-hell jeans, a tight bright blue shirt with neon green and pink writing all over the front, and these giant diamond crusted hoop earrings. His muffin top alone made me want to die... but seriously. Where are these kids' fucking parents? WHO LETS THEIR SON WALK OUT THE DOOR LOOKING LIKE THAT?! Where, for one, do they keep their testicles? How uncomfortable... honestly. These kids are supposed to be "trend setters"... the ones who don't settle for how society wants them to look... but they fail, because they all look the same.

You look like a GIRL. A pretty girl. I am convinced you have a vagina.

How many innocent animals died so you could put them on your head and call it a hair style?

The woe-is-me attitude sucks too. These kids are wimps. Life is going to kick them square in the face because they can't handle things like homework, their girl/boyfriend of two weeks dumping them, being grounded by their parents, and not getting what they want when they want it. 

Get a grip kids. Life sucks. Whining and crying about it doesn't do any good... it just makes the rest of us point and laugh at you.

(I found the images on the internet. If I infringe on any copyrights or anything, just let me know and I'll take them down)

My Ridiculous Fear of Water.

Let me just start out by saying I can swim. I can actually swim rather well. My fear stems from what could be IN the water with me... and that, my friend, comes from all of the B-horror movies I watched while growing up. Jaws too, but Jaws is classic. And when you are in the ocean, you are allowed to have a fear of being nommed on by a shark. Thats a legitimate fear. 


Alas, my fears (in fresh water) are quite stupid and uncalled for. I remember when this first started to take over my sense of reality. I had seen a movie where some teenagers snuck into this indoor pool of sorts. They were getting all hot and heavy in the pool (cause you know, the piranha didn't attack as soon as they jumped in. They wanted to be cock-blockers right as things were getting really sexy) and out of nowhere, they start screaming and there is blood everywhere in the water yada yada yada. It was really corny and stupid but my young brain didn't process that. All it wanted to process was pool = danger. So... my parents got a pool built when I was 6. And it was awesome. Until I started swimming by myself. I would start thinking about that movie... and my anxiety would start building until finally, I would jump out of the pool and scan the entire thing, making sure nothing was lurking in the measly 5 feet deep water to eat me. My fears became irrational. I starting thinking someone was going to pass by our wall and toss an alligator in there, or WORSE... a shark. Yes. We had the salt water system so I was CERTAIN a shark could survive long enough to rip off my legs and eat them.


This fear then started to strike me when I was in natural bodies of water. And it got WORSE because I could never see the bottom so I never knew what could be swimming under me. When that realization hit me, all hell broke loose in my mind. I had an obsession with sharks when I was little so I knew damn well that bull sharks could survive in fresh water. My Step-mom actually had a baby alligator for a "pet" when she was younger so I also knew that people who could no longer care for them would dump them in rivers and whatnot (not that she did that. I don't recall what she did but I know she didn't do that.). And I also knew that people could keep piranha as pets and dump them in rivers too. What was stopping them? Nothing. And as that realization grew, so did my irrational fear. 


Then came Lake Placid. Lake Placid killed me. I knew I shouldn't have watched it. I knew what it was going to do to me, but I watched it anyway and sure enough, summertime trips to the local river turned into stomach-churning freak-out fests for me. My friends were splashing and screaming and I was frantically yelling in my mind "STOP!!! The splashing attracts flesh-eating creatures of the deep!!!". When the embarrassment overcame the fear and I got in, I would be ok for a few minutes. I would even start to have a little fun. Then I started remembering where I was... and what could be in there... and my life was possibly in danger. Ohmygawd. Something just brushed my foot!!!!


I would then frantically swim as fast as I could to the shore and jump out of the water, shaking like a leaf. 


This fear is still with me to this day. Pools don't bother me anymore, but if I am in water where I cannot see the bottom, I am intensely uncomfortable. If I let it take over (as I so often do) I get a major anxiety attack and I have to get out of the water immediately. I squelch it in front of my friends most of the time because they'll never let me live it down... but I die a little inside each time I have to jump in. We'll be on a boat and everyone will be jumping off into the water... and I want to so badly... but as soon as I hit the water I flip. And don't even try to get me to do a water sport. For one, I can't. I genuinely blow at kneeboarding, wakeboarding, skiing, etc. So when I eat shit and the boat keeps going, I am left in the middle of the fucking water ALONE. I just close my eyes and pray nothing eats me.

I think I like Blogger better...

So I am going to start posting here instead. Tumblr doesn't allow comments on my posts... or not that I see anyway. I am rather unobservant so maybe I just missed it? I dunno. Anyway, I want people who don't have accounts to be able to comment on what I write so... yeah. Here we are. I'm linking to the piddly 4 posts I have on Tumblr.

http://goddessofwicked.tumblr.com/

And we'll start fresh once I can think about something else to write about...